Journey
by livesonacloudinthesky
Summary: Set after Rings of Akhaten, before Cold War. Clara and the Doctor visit an event of Clara's past, where the next danger is already waiting for them. Possible Clara/11 (Whouffle) Romance. Re-write of "Through Time & Emotion".
1. Chapter 1

Hello! This is a re-write of "Through time & emotion"  
I realized how many mistakes I had in it, so I corrected it and updated it with a new name.  
(That's why I never should be allowed to write, and update the same day with only one editing read.)

Clara/11 aka Whouffle. Set after Rings of Akhaten, before Cold War.

* * *

The Doctor was confused, not only about the mystery that was Clara Oswald, but also about his feelings surrounding her.

After losing her not once, but twice he was sure he wouldn't be able to see her die another time.

It was his top priority to keep Clara alive. Not an easy task for someone whose job was to dip right into the centre of danger.  
Travelling with him her life was doomed to end in pain and suffering, just like all the people before her did.  
The Doctor knew it was selfish of him to keep her on board of the TARDIS, to break her good-hearted spirit and go through all the pain with him, but it felt right to have her by his side.

After the recent events, Clara's first real trip with him and the TARDIS she had lost two of her most precious objects that held the memories of her mother. The Ring, she was able to get back as thank you for the lives she had saved, but the leaf? It was gone, it was gone because of him.

Clara was brave, so very brave, she knew how to hide the pain, but the Doctor could see it anyway, how much it had hurt to let the leaf go. The most important leaf in human history. How she had called it, how her parents called it.

It had hurt him too, how Clara wanted to shield the pain from him. Not wanting to let him see the reason she was unhappy.

It took him several moments after Clara had left the blue box to follow her. He felt like he needed to apologise and talk to her about what happened.

The front door stood wide open, Clara must have known he would follow her inside the house.

He found the young woman upstairs in her small room underneath the rooftop, sitting on her bed clutching her book full of memories to her chest, her eyes closed.

"Are you okay?" The Doctor approached carefully, leaning against the door frame.  
Biting her lip, Clara nodded slowly. She opened her eyes to look at him, her big sad eyes that had looked at him in amazement just hours before now looked so full of pain.  
"Do you want to talk about it? I am a great listener."

With her hand Clara motioned the Doctor to sit beside her. It took her a couple of tries to start talking.  
"I am afraid I will forget my mother. How she looked or smelled like. Her voice, Doctor, I don't remember what she sounded like. I don't want to forget about my mum, not a single detail, but I do, each day I remember less. The book was always something my mum and I shared. When I was little and feeling ill she always would make me a cup of tea, sit beside me on my bed and we would go trough the book and make up stories. Now I feel like the book is not the same."

Clara rested her head on the Doctors shoulder, his fingers stroking softly through her hair.  
"You won't forget her, Clara, she is forever cherished in your heart. Believe me, I am over thousand years old, you won't forget her."

"You think so?"  
"I know so!"

"Doctor, do you think I could see her? Could we go back in time and visit her? She wouldn't have to know who I am; I just need to see her one last time."

He thought about it for several moments and then grinned at the young woman beside him whose eyes were so sad, but now had a glimmer of hope.

"There are rules Clara, you can't fix what happened. I need you to know that, I can't save your mother, as much as I wanted to, it's a fixed point in time. We also can't risk creating a Paradox. So we can not revisit a memory. You also can't tell anyone who you are."

Clara's face lit up and she wrapped her arms tight around the Time Lord.  
"Thank you Doctor, thank you so much. I just really want to see her."

The Doctor leaned down to the smaller woman and gave her a sweet kiss on the top of her head. "Come on then, let's meet your mother. Any date in particular?"

"Their Wedding!" Clara shouted without any hesitation. "I would like to be able to see their Wedding. I've seen photos, she looked so gorgeous. I really want to see it in person."

The Doctor nodded: "Alright, We could pretend to be serving at the ceremony. I probably still have outfits in the wardrobe."

In seconds Clara had her red purse packed. Even "101 Places to see" was allowed back inside it. Happily she skipped down stairs into the blue box. The Time Lord followed her. He was amazed how quickly Clara's mood had changed. Just a minute ago she was so sad, and now she was bouncing with energy. Her energy was the perfect match to his own.

On their way through the TARDIS Clara chatted about everything her parents had told her about their wedding day. Even for the Doctors standards it was hard to keep up with her pace.

The Time Lord caught himself desperately trying to keep up; with every other person he would have just blended it out, but never with Clara. He was so fascinated by her that her didn't even noticed that they passed the wardrobe five minutes ago.

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Much better aye?  
Please Review?

always,  
lena


	2. Chapter 2

hello! there is part two of the re-written thing.

* * *

The Doctor was right; the waiter outfits were indeed still in the biggest wardrobe in the universe. Clara had changed last; she looked absolutely stunning, stepping out on the long hallways of the TARDIS. The Time Lord couldn't help but notice how she filled out all the parts of the outfit that should be filled. His heartbeats quickened a pace or two, when he noticed that she check his outfit just like he did with hers, but instead of the smile and compliment he had liked to hear she busted into a laughing fit.

"Blimey Doctor, you look ridiculous! No way I will let you go outside dressed like this."

"Oh shut up!"  
The Doctor grimaced, which send his companion into another hysterics. The sound of her laughter was beautiful. In all of the years of travelling around the stars, he could swear that he had never heard a more beautiful sound than the sound of her laughter.

It took him a few minutes to get changed back into his usual cloths. He figured no one would even hand him another tablet if they saw how clumsy he could be.

The two of them landed just the right time, the ceremony was about to begin and Clara's dad was waiting in front of a beautiful decorated room in an old mansion. Clara had told him earlier that this very mansion belonged to her uncle.

Clara quickly grabbed a tablet with biscuits and carried it over where the Doctor waited for her to join him. The wedding march started playing and Clara's mother entered the room. The Doctor could feel the gasp running through Clara's body; she had pressed her back against him for support.

She had seen enough photographs of this day, of her mother, but she looked even more beautiful in person. It was hard to look away from her, to her dad, who had never looked happier in his entire life.

She hadn't noticed that she started crying until the Doctor gave her his handkerchief to dry her eyes. The black of her mascara coloured it dark, she turned around to apologise for ruining it, but he just shook his head laughing softly and squeezed her shoulder lightly.  
"Don't worry, keep it. I have the feeling you could need it again."

In this moment she was overwhelmed with grief, joy and confusion.

_Grief?_ Because she missed her mother

_Joy?_ Because was happy to see her parents so happy.

_Confusion?_ Because she felt like a hundreds of butterflies invaded her stomach.

The Doctor was right, as always, she indeed had needed to dry her eyes a couple more times through out the ceremony. It was beautiful and Clara was sure she could never pay back the gift the Doctor gave her by allowing her to go here.

Clara quickly vanished into the upstairs bedroom with attached bathroom, she always stayed at in her childhood, to freshen up her make-up. She was pretending to be a waitress after all; she couldn't go downstairs with her make up all messy. Maybe the serving thing was a good thing; maybe she would be able to talk to her mother.

The Doctor had come upstairs with her, staying in the bedroom while she had locked herself in the bathroom. When she came back outside, she found him looking out of the floor length window.

He hadn't noticed her, so she cleared her throat; the doctor spun around smiled his stupid goofy smile at her.  
"So, all freshened up." She grinned and pulled her hair into a tight ponytail.  
"I see. You're ok now?" the Doctor asked her, studying her face carefully.  
"Yes. I was just a little emotional, seeing my mother again." Clara quickly crossed the distance between them and pulled the tall man down to her into a hug. "Thank you Doctor. I can't even tell you how thankful I am."

There was the feeling again, the feeling that made him feel like everything was going to be alright. That she belonged into his arms.  
The tingling sensation, which he only ever had once, all those years ago, when he was practically still a child. The feeling when he met his wife, his first wife.

With Rose he felt love, even with River he felt a strong affection, but never this intense. Clara was special to his heart. Ever since he met her in the Asylum as Dalek and then again on Christmas he knew she would be. After he found her again, in this time, he promised himself he would guard her with his life, but every time Clara was unimpressed by what he did he was amazed. She didn't think of him as the big hero, she just saw the mad man with a blue box, a snoggbox, how she called it.  
He liked her because she was his equal; she sometimes even managed to over think him, which should be impossible. But that's what she was: Impossible.

"You don't have to thank me, because I have to thank you, for travelling with me. I've been alone for a long time until I met you, the second you." The Doctor paused, realizing he just told Clara about the different versions of herself scattered through time and space; he pulled out of the embrace to see the question mark in Clara's face. "Don't look at me like that, I'll explain later. Anyways, now with you at my side I feel like I can be myself again. Enjoy the beauty of the universe. So no, you don't get to say thank you, because nothing could make up for the feeling you give me Clara Oswin Oswald."

Clara wanted to response but the lack of words just left her astonished.

She held his stare, she could see the honesty in his eyes and that it took him some courage to say the words out loud. She saw denial and insecurity in them too, but she couldn't figure out why. Suddenly she felt like she had to know, like she needed to know.

* * *

I need reviews like the doctor needs his sonic. ;)

always,  
lena


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